Month: December 2018

The Time We Have…

/ Jame A. Agapoff, MD, MS (she/they) / Leave a comment

52, regular gym goer, no known medical problems, died suddenly of a heart attack on Christmas Eve. It sounds surreal, but it happens every day.

The Tibetan Buddhists say that our lives are like flashes of lightning in the dark of night. The time we have is brief and uncertain. Yet, our actions do not match this reality.

Our attachment to this impermanent world brings us continual suffering. We sacrifice the moment for a past that is gone and a future that may never be. The time we have is fleeting but how we choose to use it is our own.

To enrich our lives, and the lives of others, we must act in the moment. Listed below are some powerful ways to live a meaningful present life.

  1. Act. Even small acts can lead to big results over time.
  2. Do not wait for others. You are the master of your own enlightenment.
  3. Keep it simple. Most problems can be broken down into more simple parts that are easier to overcome.
  4. Disagree but accept. Life will throw you curveballs and disappointments. The earlier you accept them, the faster you can overcome them.
  5. Choose virtuous friends. You are transformed by your associations.
  6. Speak truth. People know a liar.
  7. Be kind. People are more fragile than you think.
  8. Be the change you want to see in the world. Our greatest strength is our example.
  9. Forgive. Our forgiveness brings us closer to the infinite than any other act and releases us from the bonds of anger and hate.

May everyone have a blessed and prosperous new year!

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Hate: The Dark Side of the Force

/ Jame A. Agapoff, MD, MS (she/they) / Leave a comment

Political extremism is perhaps the greatest threat to our nation. The rhetoric that fosters hate is promoted as strength, while compromise and union are labeled as weakness. The anger around us is deafening and is getting louder.

Strong emotions can overpower rational thought. This is because there are more excitatory inputs connecting the primitive (emotional) limbic brain to the logical, prefrontal cortex than inhibitory connections traveling in the reverse direction. Therefore, when we experience stimuli that trigger strong emotional responses those stimuli can overpower our ability to respond with sensible actions.

A study by Zeki and Romaya identified the neural circuits mediating “hate.” MRIs conducted while people viewed faces of individuals they hated, identified increased activity in several brain regions including the medial frontal gyrus, the right putamen, premotor cortex, frontal pole, and the medial insula. One interesting discovery in this study was that intense love and intense hate both activated the putamen and the insula, indicating that these emotions share cannot exist together.

In a recent editorial, Dr. Nasrallah poses the interesting question of what happens to the capacity to love among political extremists. If these individuals are filled with hate, do they lose the capacity to love, and is this hate as intoxicating as passionate love? Could it be that hate is enjoyable to these individuals, and they go out of their way to kindle it like a dark force bringing them strength?

Science fiction is often a lens to explore complex social topics. As the Jedi Master Yoda stated and modern neuroscience has proven, “You will know good from bad when you are at peace and passive.” He also said, “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”

Suffering is the real cost of hate. Suffering for ourselves, our planet, and our fellow man. That is why we must resist hate and the dark side of the force. Neurobiology shows us that we can be strong in love or in hate, but not both. We must choose which to nurture. I choose love.

References:

Zeki, Semir, and John Paul Romaya. “Neural correlates of hate.” PloS one 3.10 (2008): e3556.

Nasrallah, Henry A. “Neuropolitics in the age of extremism: Brain regions involved in hatred.” Current Psychiatry 17.10 (2018): 6-8.

i hate nothing about you with red heart light

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Picking Up Pennies

/ Jame A. Agapoff, MD, MS (she/they) / Leave a comment

Human beings are capable of profound acts. We can transform our minds, our bodies, and our environment in ways that other beings cannot. The stories of our lives are remembered by the big choices we make, but even those events are built upon the accumulation of many others. Each small act has the potential to slowly transform us. Like a person who picks up pennies on the road, the worth of each act may feel inconsequential alone, but over time, the wealth generated by our choices may be profound.

Every day we have opportunities to be kind. Holding the door for someone, letting them merge in front of you in traffic, smiling, saying hello, taking the time to listen, to provide assurance, and to be empathetic. All of us have these opportunities, and each of us has at one time, or another ignored them like we ignore discarded pennies on the sidewalk.

Generating a heart of compassion cannot be accomplished overnight, but neither is it difficult. The compassionate heart is built upon small acts of kindness. Just as pennies invested in a compound interest account will create more wealth over time, the heart built upon small acts of kindness is vastly greater than the sum of its individual acts. So next time you see a penny on the side of the road, remember to think of others, and know that every penny is worth picking up.

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The Wisdom of Editors

/ Jame A. Agapoff, MD, MS (she/they) / Leave a comment

When I was in my teens, I submitted a story to a periodical that specialized in Victorian ghost stories. I submitted the story through the mail in a big yellow envelope, with another yellow envelope folded within for return mailing. At the time, I thought my supernatural yarn quite witty, and I expected, as most people do when they submit something, that it would be published.

I remember with dismay the day my folded yellow envelope came back to me.  Along with a letter that began with the fateful, “We are sorry to inform you…,” was a copy of my manuscript replete with red ink and notes. My first thought was ‘Why bother if you’re just going to reject it?’ Still, I read the notes, and as much as I agreed to disagree with the final assessment, I could not disregard the comments as pointless.

Had I a little more experience, I would have found special meaning with the time the Editor spent reviewing my work. His ‘rejection’ was actually an invitation for a dialogue of revision. Of course, I did not see it that way at the time, and sadly, I have since lost his letter and the story I wrote, but I will never forget the kindness that Editor showed me, and how it made me a better writer.

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How Your Writing Can Transform the World

/ Jame A. Agapoff, MD, MS (she/they) / Leave a comment

Words are powerful. Every time we open our mouth or publish a post, we create an opportunity to lead or to divide. A few words can end a relationship or thaw a frozen heart. Our words can inspire and entertain, and if we are lucky, create a legacy that lives beyond us.

Like our actions, our writing can conform to the world or transform it. As creative writers, our stories can explore the intricacies of the human condition, and allow us to find ways to move our readers and our society in a positive direction.

As a child of the 1980’s, I saw a tremendous progress for good: I witnessed the end of the Cold War, grassroots environmentalism, and a rising social justice. I believed as Belinda Carlisle sang that heaven could, in fact, be a ‘place on earth.’

Naive? Yes. What I have come to accept is that history is not linear, it’s more like a series of interconnected circles that move forward slowly, sometimes with painstaking repetition. I’ve seen this in my own life, in the lives of others, and in our society as a whole. The path ahead might be slow, but I’m willing to take it a few words at a time, careful not to write something that will make me repeat history again and again.

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Compassion: An Endless Source of Inspiration

/ Jame A. Agapoff, MD, MS (she/they) / Leave a comment

If you are reading this blog, you are already blessed beyond measure. You have a quality of life absent for most of human history. Yet still, in this age of prosperity and opportunity, humans and other beings suffer, sometimes as a consequence of our own good fortune.

Think for a moment about our possessions. Where did they come from? How were they made? Where do they go when we discard them? Many of us don’t want to know the answer to these questions just like we don’t want to know where the cleanly packaged supermarket meat comes from. Knowing implies responsibility. Sadly, ignorance does not absolve us of guilt. That is the dilemma our society faces, and each of us is complicit in the end results.

However, this is not a message of doom and gloom, but one of hope. I believe in the goodness of each person and the compassion we share. We are the most generous nation on the planet, and our values have guided the world through the darkest of times. This must be defended. But even we must strive to improve. Our compassion makes us great, but our fear threatens to destroy us.

When I get up each morning and sit on my meditation cushion, I cultivate a heart of compassion to guide me through my day. Compassion is my ally, and a powerful ally it is. It tempers my responses and demands I make amends when I stray into anger. It puts the needs of others before my own, which ironically never fails to serve me. It reminds me to teach and not to judge, and inspires me to write, to work, to serve, and to keep growing until the time I am blessed with ends.

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